The Art of Winter Dressing
Be Fashionable and Cozy!
All fashion is art, but figuring out how to stay warm and comfortable while still looking chic is a special winter challenge. Luckily, mastering this art is going to be easy this year. We are officially entering the colder months, which designers are calling “swaddle season.” Let’s be ready for the winter chill with all the swaddled-up yet fashionable offerings available. Things are about to get frosty!
One of the fashion headlines of this year is the resurgence of the turtleneck. This isn’t the passé turtleneck that felt like a choker. This season’s turtlenecks are much more comfortable! Imagine a funnel neck that fits loosely but is tall around the neck, or a cowl neck worn high on the back of the neck but drapey and soft around the front.
The latest amazing soft fabrics in outerwear design feature high necklines and sometimes include turned-up fur-lined collars. Another warm trend is the scarf coat. Some designers have attached an oversized scarf directly to the coat, while others provide a matching fabric scarf that goes with the coat. If you are not ready for new outerwear this year, just shop for a huge, oversized scarf that complements your current coat. Layers are always the answer when it comes to bundling up for warmth. Capes, ponchos, and scarves will keep you warm and trendy this winter season.
Two-piece matching outfits are popular this year, again featuring cozy, soft sweater fabrics. Create a look with two pieces made to go together, but combine them in a casual way. Add a vest for that polished third piece or wrap yourself in an oversized, buttery-soft fabric scarf or cape. Sweater dresses are a super soft alternative and are easy to dress up or down.
Another cool trend for 2024 is what designers are calling the “mob wife” aesthetic. Think of Carmela from “The Sopranos.” This look won’t appeal to everyone, but I love it! It’s a return to shapely silhouettes versus the oversized and baggy trends of the past few years. Faux fur, leather and fur, shearling, and vintage pieces make dramatic statements.
Fabrics have become so innovative that leather looks are everywhere. Notice that I said leather “looks.” I just purchased a cotton jean jacket that is finished in a coating that resembles leather. Blazers, dresses, and jackets that look like leather but are lightweight and extremely soft are popping up everywhere. I don’t know what magic transforms these fabrics, but they are incredibly beautiful and easy to purchase, as they are not expensive.
For many recent seasons, comfort was the driving force in fashion. This year, classic American sportswear is back. Beautifully tailored trousers, the classic trench coat, the crisp white shirt, and the soft buttery satin blouse are back and are as chic as ever. American sportswear is the core of everyday dressing for women. Basic quality fabrics in classic cuts never go out of style and can be worn with confidence for years. Add a little trendy flair to your classic outfit for a newly polished look. This winter, we’ll see a return to luxury looks that give off an elegant vibe.
With all this talk of simple elegance and classic sportswear, you’ll need to know how to personalize your outfit. Accessories can make a powerful impact on a classic wardrobe.
Wide belts are back in a big way. A midwestern favorite seems to be a wide belt with a large gold buckle. Belts are more flexible these days; some are made entirely of elastic stretch and others have leather in the front and stretch in the back. A belt can turn any classic sportswear into a polished look.
If you do choose a belt with a gold buckle, complete the look with chunky gold earrings. The collarbone-grazing delicate layered necklaces reigned supreme for a few years, so it’s refreshing to see longer, larger pendant necklaces this year. Longer necklaces look great with this season’s turtleneck trend, too.
Who goes into fall without wanting to purchase a new pair of boots? Burgundy is the color of the moment and is being touted as “the new black” for fall. Burgundy is simply taking over footwear. It complements any color and will be seen in everything from booties to knee-high kicks. This rich wine shade is the perfect update to your shoe closet. Burgundy adds a bit of warmth to any outfit and is a standout for fall handbags, belts, and footwear.
Accessories are a simple way to spruce up your winter wardrobe with personality and individuality. Be fashionable and cozy with your favorite fall classics, adding a few of these 2024 trends to elevate and update your cold weather wardrobe!
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Editor’s Note: Holly has been in the fashion industry for over 30 years as a buyer, boutique store owner, visual merchandiser, and fashion show producer. She is currently the owner of a modeling agency. Holly regularly appears on local TV doing fashion segments.
Fashion Worthy
By Holly Bell
Weekend Gourmet
Sprinkles and Jingles—Let’s Eat!
Monte Cristo Brunch Casserole
Mix 2 and 1/2 cups of milk with 8 eggs, 3 cloves of minced garlic, and salt and pepper to taste. Grease a 9x13-inch baking dish and line it with slices of sturdy Italian bread. Spread soft butter and Dijon mustard on the bread. Top with thin slices of ham and sliced or shredded Swiss cheese. (You can top with another thin slice of bread—your choice.) Pour the egg mixture over the casserole. Cover and chill overnight. Bake at 350 degrees for 35 minutes, or until eggs are set. Let stand for 10 minutes. Sprinkle with powdered sugar. Serve with jams and fresh fruit.
Ham Appetizers
Unroll 2 tubes of refrigerated crescent roll dough and press them into a rectangle. Blend a bit of Dijon and mayo together and spread it over the dough. Next, add layers of thinly sliced or chopped ham and shredded cheeses, along with any cut-up cooked veggies you desire. Roll up into a log, using a bit of egg wash to seal it up. Cut into 1.5-inch slices. Bake at 375 degrees for 20-25 minutes, until brown and gooey.
Oven Brats and Veggies
In a large bowl, mix 1/4 cup of grainy mustard with 1/4 cup of maple syrup and 1/4 cup of olive oil. Add 6-8 brats (cut into halves or thirds), 1 chunk-cut onion, 6-8 quartered potatoes, and a variety (2-3 cups) of veggies—small carrots, small Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, broccoli, etc. Toss the mixture to coat, and spread onto a parchment-lined pan. Sprinkle with salt and pepper, sesame seeds, or whatever spices you prefer. Bake at 425 degrees for 30 minutes, stirring a few times. Top with shredded cheese and serve with crusty garlic bread.
Holiday Bisque
Melt 1/2 stick of butter in a heavy soup pot. Add 1/2 of a chopped onion, 1 diced celery stalk, 1 diced carrot, and 1/4 of a diced green pepper. Stir and sauté for 5 minutes. Add 1 can of drained corn, 1 can of creamed corn, 1 can of cream of shrimp soup, 2 cans of cream of onion soup, 1 can of cream of potato soup, and 1 quart of Half & Half. Simmer and stir for 5 minutes. Add 1 can of Rotel tomatoes and a bag of frozen salad (tiny) shrimp (or 2 cans of shrimp, drained), along with 1 teaspoon of Old Bay or Cajun seasoning. Add a can of chicken broth if you think it is too thick. Cook on low for 10 minutes. Serve with oyster crackers, butter crackers, or rye toast croutons.
Beef Tenderloin with Merlot Sauce
For the beef: Take a 3-pound piece of beef tenderloin and rub in 1 Tablespoon of olive oil, along with cracked pepper and kosher salt to taste. Bake it on a bed of sliced onions and garlic at 425 degrees for 35-40 minutes, until an internal thermometer registers 130 degrees. Remove from oven and cover in foil for 10 minutes. Slice and serve with merlot sauce.
For the sauce: While the tenderloin is baking, mix 1/2 cup of currant jelly with 1/2 cup of Merlot and 1/4 cup of beef broth in a small saucepan. Simmer for 25-30 minutes, until syrupy. Add 1 Tablespoon of butter to the sauce right before serving.
Christmas Eve French Onion Soup
In a stockpot, slowly sauté (on low) 3 or 4 large, sliced onions in 4 Tablespoons of butter, until golden brown, stirring often. Sprinkle 1 Tablespoon of flour over the onions, along with salt and pepper, as desired. Add 5 cups of beef broth or stock and bring to a boil. Lower the temperature and let the soup simmer for 30 minutes. Toast 4 thick slices of French bread and place each one in an oven-proof bowl. Sprinkle the bread with Parmesan cheese. Pour soup into the bowls and top with a thick slice of Swiss or Gruyére cheese. Carefully place the bowls on a cookie sheet. Broil in the oven for 1-2 minutes, until the cheese browns.
Meemi’s Christmas Eve Tortellini Soup
Brown a pound of loose (no casings) mild or hot Italian sausage and pat off the grease. Add 1/2 cup of minced onion and 1 clove of minced garlic. Sauté for 5 minutes. Add 6 cups of chicken or vegetable broth and 1 can of chopped tomatoes. Bring to a boil, then turn the heat down. Cook the tortellini according to package directions and add to the soup pot. Heat through. (You can cook this all day in a slow cooker on low, adding the cooked tortellini during the last 30 minutes of cooking.) Serve with crusty parmesan rolls for dipping.
Best Cutout Sugar Cookies
Mix 1 cup of soft butter with 1 and 1/2 cups of powdered sugar, 1 egg, 1 teaspoon of vanilla, and 1/2 teaspoon of almond flavoring. Blend in 2 and 1/2 cups of flour, 1 teaspoon of baking soda, and 1 teaspoon of cream of tartar. Refrigerate for 2-3 hours. Roll out and cut into desired shapes. Sprinkle with holiday sugar and bake for 7-8 minutes at 375 degrees. Alternatively, bake without sprinkles, then let cool and frost or paint as desired.
Real Deal Candy Cheesecake
Mix 2 cups of graham cracker crumbs, 1/2 cup of melted butter, and 2 Tablespoons of sugar. Pat into a lightly greased 9-inch springform pan and place in the freezer. Combine 4 (8-oz) packages of softened cream cheese, 1 and 1/3 cups of sugar, 2 Tablespoons of cornstarch, 2 Tablespoons of vanilla, and 3 room-temperature eggs. Mix for 5 minutes on medium speed, adding 1 cup of sour cream. Pour the mixture into the crust. Place on a cookie sheet and bake at 325 degrees for 75 minutes. Cool and refrigerate.
Remove from pan and slice. Crumble your favorite holiday candies. Put a dollop of whipped cream on top of each slice of cheesecake. Sprinkle crumbled candies and chocolate shavings on the whipped cream. Serve with fruit sauces.
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Editor’s Note: Kate has been an Omaha area culinary instructor since 1997. She attended The Institute for the Culinary Arts at Metropolitan Community College in Omaha.
By Kate Beiting
Zodiac Forecast
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
This month at work, you’ll be tempted to act rashly. Instead, take your time and think it through. On the home front, an argument may erupt that could eventually lead to a reconciliation with a family member. The bustle of the holiday season can leave you feeling sluggish. Don’t forget to take some time for yourself!
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) Communication will take effort this month. Listen to hear, not just to respond. It’s a great time to wrap up loose ends. Hold off on diving in to new projects until after the new year.
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 19) Your determination will be strong this month, but don’t go overboard! Your focus will be on family and friendships. Remember that good things come to those who wait.
Pisces (Feb. 20 – Mar. 21) You will have lots of energy this month. Use it for peaceful purposes. Change makes you nervous, but stay the course. Try to understand your partner’s point of view.
Aries (Mar. 22 – Apr. 19) Your relationship may need a little TLC. Staying home instead of traveling this month might be beneficial. Either way, be sure to take time to focus on each other in the midst of the holiday bustle.
Taurus (Apr. 20 – May 20) You have the strength you need to overcome obstacles this month. An issue with real estate might loom large. Keep an eye on your holiday shopping budget so you don’t start the new year with buyers’ remorse. You can enjoy the holidays without breaking the bank!
Gemini (May 21 – Jun. 20) Less can be more when it comes to your holiday gift list. Respect your budget! The gift of time is the best thing you can offer to relationships that need attention. Enjoy each other!
Cancer (Jun. 21 – Jul. 22) Ambition is vital to success, but it can become an obstacle if it goes unchecked. Remember to work within your limits. You have many positive traits and don’t always have to fight to succeed. Let them come to you!
Leo (Jul. 23 – Aug. 22) December is a time of both joy and stress. Develop a plan of action and stick to it. If you feel like you’re in a maze, climb a wall to change your perspective.
Virgo (Aug. – Sep. 22) The breakthrough you thought you would see at work won’t happen in the way you expected. Your logic and inner calm will serve you well this month.
Libra (Sep. 23 – Oct. 22) This month you may have to choose between two undesirable options. Seek others’ opinions while you weigh your choice. You’ll spend a lot of time with children this month. They will appreciate your energy!
Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) Work will be extremely busy, but relationships with colleagues look strong. Your personal life will need your attention this month, and home projects may need to be put on hold.
A Woman's Work
Behind the Music
My Favorite Christmas Songs
The holiday season is upon us, and it is my favorite time of year. I love the hustle and bustle, the family gatherings, and the music. What would Christmastime be like without Christmas songs? Let’s take a look at the history of some popular favorites.
According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the version of “White Christmas” sung by Bing Crosby is not only the best-selling Christmas/holiday single in the United States but also the best-selling single of all time, with estimated sales in excess of 50 million copies worldwide. The song was written by Irving Berlin for a movie called “Holiday Inn,” and it won the Oscar for Best Original Song in 1943. It established the concept that a generally secular song about Christmas could be a commercial success.
“Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” is the story of a scrappy young reindeer who felt like an outcast but ended up saving Christmas for everyone. You may be surprised to learn that the song was essentially autobiographical. It was written by Robert L. May, who, having skipped grades, was younger than his classmates and felt that he didn’t belong. He wrote himself into Rudolph, who was first envisioned as a children’s book before becoming a Christmas song.
“Silent Night” was a poem before it was a song. A Catholic priest wrote the poem while stationed at a church in Mariapfarr, Austria. He then asked Franz Gruber to write guitar music to go with the poem. The two performed it on Christmas Eve 1818 with the help of the church’s choir. Not until 40 years later was the song was translated into English.
Though arguably one of the most popular Christmas songs, “Jingle Bells” wasn’t meant to be a Christmas song at all. James Lord Pierpont wrote it in the 1850s, and it was originally titled “The One-Horse Open Sleigh.” It was meant to be a Thanksgiving song until it grew in popularity as a Yuletide tune. After some revisions, the song was renamed “Jingle Bells” in 1857. On December 16, 1965, it became the first song played in outer space. The crew of Gemini 6 performed the song with bells and a harmonica that they had snuck on board. Astronaut Tom Stafford reported later that they never considered just singing the song because he “couldn’t carry a tune in a bushel basket.”
Most historians and Christmas carol enthusiasts agree that “The Twelve Days of Christmas” began as a memory game. As the list of objects, animals, or people increases with each verse, one must pay attention to everything mentioned previously in the list. The 12 days refer to the time between December 25th (Christmas) and January 6th (the Epiphany).
“O Tannenbaum” (in English, “O Christmas Tree”) comes from Germany, and the earliest version of the song dates back to the 16th century. Composer Melchior Franck wrote it as a folk song about the tradition of bringing a tree into your home and decorating it for Christmas. The song’s success is shown through its appearance in many Christmas compilations and movies. You may remember it from 1965’s “A Charlie Brown Christmas,” in which the song is famously played by the Vince Guaraldi Trio.
“What Child Is This?” was written in 1865 by an insurance company manager named William Chatterton Dix who was based in Glasgow, Scotland. He got seriously ill in his 20s, and when he recovered, he was a born-again Christian. He penned several hymns, including this one, which was set to the tune of the English folk song “Greensleeves.”
The lyrics to the hopeful yet mournful carol “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” were written by Hugh Martin for a scene in the 1944 movie musical “Meet Me in St. Louis.” Judy Garland sings the bittersweet song to her little sister, trying to cheer her up as they both lament their family’s move away from their hometown. The lyricist changed some of the song’s initial words to make it more hopeful.
When I was young, I had a buck tooth that afforded me the distinct honor of singing “All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth” at holiday assemblies. It was written in 1944 by grade school teacher Donald Gardner. When Donald asked his second graders what they wanted for Christmas, he noticed that most of them replied with a slight lisp…like many second graders, most of them were missing a front tooth or two! A classic song was born.
Over the years, many Christmas songs have become classics and are part of holiday celebrations around the world. What are some of your favorites?
By Deborah Daley
Fresh Concepts
Resolutions for the New Year
Kickstart the Year With Positive Change!
Almost instinctively, the new year beckons us to hit reset, refresh, and tackle all the things that keep us up at night. Before the countdown, sit down with your favorite journal or at the computer and write down some goals for the new year. Setting goals feeds our desire to launch into positive change. It helps us believe in who we are and what we’re capable of. New Year’s goals give us direction, motivation, and a sense of purpose. Let’s look at some ideas for resolutions, as well as strategies to achieve them!
Before we dive in, a few statistics. We can thank ancient Babylonians as the first to make New Year’s resolutions some 4,000 years ago. They were the first to promise debt repayment and the first to hold celebrations for the new year. We don’t know how well they fared back then, but the practice stuck. In fact, three in five Americans made New Year’s resolutions last year.
Forbes cites some interesting statistics, including that 62 percent of the people surveyed for 2024 said they felt pressure to set a New Year’s resolution. The highest percentage of goal setters (48%) choose improved fitness as their top goal, a sharp contrast from the prior year, when improved mental health was the top priority. Other common goals included improved finances (38%), losing weight (34%), and improved diet (32%). A smaller percentage (from 3% to 6%) chose traveling more, meditating regularly, drinking less alcohol, and better work performance as their top goal.
And how do we fare today with keeping resolutions? Although intentions are good, the average resolutions lasted about 3.74 months last year. Don’t ditch your goals just yet! The type of goal you set matters. Setting realistic and specific goals helps us focus on small steps and achievable changes to reach success. If you stray from the path, take time to recommit.
The number one resolution over the years is losing weight and exercising. What a great goal…but what is your plan to get there? Is it realistic to plan a gym visit every day? Start small and choose a routine that doesn’t sound daunting. Consider pledging to meet this goal with a friend! You’ll hold each other accountable and have more fun. Find a fitness program that you love or take the journey with a personal trainer. They’ll customize your workouts, help with fitness goals and measure success. The result? Better sleep, less stress, more confidence, and skinny jeans by summer! Or simply swap out gym days for a plan to “move more” throughout the day, like taking the stairs instead of the elevator, walking around the block on your lunch break, or parking farther from the door when you go to the store.
More exercise and losing weight often go hand in hand with a healthier diet. If the idea of another “diet” makes you roll your eyes, hire a dietician or nutritionist to lead the way. Accountability is the name of the game, and the professionals are worth the time and money spent. After all, this is your health you’re talking about!
We all know by now that eating a variety of healthy foods is the best diet for overall health. Make it fun and play chef with savory dishes that combine colorful, versatile, whole foods that are both healthy and tasty. Try taco-stuffed sweet potatoes for a load of vitamin C, potassium, and fiber. How about veggie frittatas, a superfood salmon salad, or quinoa stew? Skip the processed foods (any food that’s changed from its natural state, often with additives). You’ll feel better, lower your risk for disease, strengthen immunities, and live longer!
Next, let’s talk about money. We want to earn more, save more, and live better. These are great goals, but you still need a plan to get moving.
Many Americans have turned to creative ideas to improve their finances. Some ideas are obvious, like making more income with a second job. Not a bad idea, but what that second job should be may seem less obvious. Take stock of the valuable skills you may already have, like a second language, computer expertise, or artistic prowess, and look for ways to get paid for your expertise. Or take the opportunity to learn new skills and advance your career in the process. Of course, instead of a side hustle, you could opt to ask for a raise or seek a promotion with your current employer. Get creative!
To keep your finances healthy, you also need to learn how to spend less. Budgeting can be fun when you consider the outcome! The 50-30-20 budget rule advises spending up to 50 percent of your after-tax income on needs and obligations. As for the other half? Dedicate 20 percent to savings and 30 percent to whatever you choose. Hello, massage!
Look into investing with a financial planner. Investment comes with risk, but there’s a potential for high returns. Seek out an online budgeting app to help plan your savings goals (try consumerfinace.gov). Keep a minimum of three months of living expenses in a separate account in case of emergencies. And don’t forget to invest in your 401(k) or IRA!
It’s never too late to quit smoking or drink less, but breaking an addiction or even just a bad habit is no picnic. Instead of going cold turkey, consider counseling to help sort out your feelings, tackle withdrawal, and come out healthier than when you started.
If you want to improve your mental health, consider making a goal to travel more. Yes, for your mental health! Travel preferences are different for everyone, but whether we choose an exotic location or our own hometown, travel exposes us to different environments and a different way of thinking. You may be surprised to learn that we create certain antibodies that boost our immune system when we’re exploring new cultures. Travel can relieve stress and boost our emotional state. If travel anxiety is a roadblock, plan ahead to maintain healthy habits while away from home. Incorporate fun exercise, like hiking scenic views, and seek out local restaurants instead of swinging by a fast food joint. Find a therapist who “gets it” and work out a travel plan.
What if your goal is simply to reduce stress for a happier life? Happiness is different for everyone, but one thing is for sure: less stress will help. Set goals for living mindfully; that is, focusing on the moment you’re in whenever you can. Emotions are tricky, but accepting your thoughts and feelings is an essential part of nurturing your mental health. Try new things. Learn new skills. Develop more direction in your life for a sense of purpose.
Do kind things for others. Volunteering your time is one of the most valuable ways to increase happiness. You’ll help someone who needs assistance, and you’ll feel good about yourself for doing so—as you should! Remember, one of the most important life skills ever learned is resilience. Find a way to bounce back from setbacks and you’ll be all the stronger for it. Explore your inner self under the guidance of a professional. Set a goal to improve mental health—you’ll discover the journey is respite for the soul.
Improving personal relationships is a great resolution that can add quality and years to your life. Healthy relationships strengthen your immune system, reduce stress, improve mood, and create a sense of belonging. Block out more time on your calendar for family and friends. Prioritize group activities like frequent family dinners or regular video calls. One woman I know plays Bananagrams with her family every Sunday—in a Google Meet that reaches across time zones. Whether you’re nurturing old friends or making new ones, include the five As: attention, acceptance, appreciation, allowing, and affection!
Before the ball drops and the fireworks explode, sit down with a journal and reflect on goals that deeply resonate. That alone is inspiration for change! Write down specific goals, dreams, and aspirations, then ease in gradually. Resolutions can be simple. Drink more water (specify how much), learn something new, read more books, cook something new each week, join a weekly yoga class, or hire a sleep therapist. These are all realistic, positive changes. Self-care is huge this year, so don’t forget to treat yourself to a day spa regularly. Take time to kickstart your “happy” in the new year.
Sources for this article included: forbes.com, healthline.com, and goodhousekeeping.com.
By Janette Calabro
Good Looks
Luxurious Holiday Gifting
Spa Packages
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The holiday shopping season is here. Our gift list is long, and our time is short. For the people on your list who could use a little pampering, consider a luxurious, relaxing spa package. Spas offer gift packages for many of their most popular services, from manicures and pedicures to massages and facials, from anti-aging treatments to a full day at the spa. After all, the holidays can be stressful, and a spa package is just what the doctor ordered for rejuvenation and relaxation. You can find gift packages to fit your budget, from $50 to $200 and up.
One of the most budget-friendly options is a spa manicure or pedicure. During a pampering manicure, you relax with a warm neck pillow while a technician applies an exfoliating scrub from your elbows to your fingertips, followed by a hydrating massage and a warm paraffin dip to seal in moisture. Nails are clipped, shaped, filed, and polished. A pedicure often begins with an oil-infused foot bath, followed by an exfoliating, hydrating massage, and ending with a warm paraffin soak. After the nails have been shaped and trimmed, pick your color, and continue to relax with that warm neck pillow until your nail tech is done.
To make your gift even more fun, consider a chocolate, wine, or margarita pedicure. A chocolate pedicure immerses the feet in a chocolate soak, followed by a chocolate mask, and then chocolate lotion to finish it off. Cocoa is a natural moisturizer, softening dry foot skin. While you’re waiting for your polish to dry, enjoy a decadent piece of antioxidizing dark chocolate.
During a wine pedicure, the feet are wrapped in a grape mask and massaged with grapeseed oil while the lucky recipient sips a glass of their favorite red or white! After all, wine does contain rejuvenating antioxidants. If you’re a margarita gal, imagine soaking your toes in a lime bath, scrubbing off that dead skin with a sea salt scrub, finishing with lime massage oil, and topping it off with a shot of tequila!
A facial is a wonderful way to pamper someone special. Basic facials deep clean, rehydrate, and rejuvenate the area of the body that is most exposed to free radicals and the elements. Beyond the basics, an antioxidant facial utilizes creams and masks enriched with vitamin E and beta carotene, which fight those free radicals. Paraffin facials place layers of paraffin-soaked gauze on the skin to soften and seal in moisture. Check with a local spa for other options.
Is there someone on your list who would love a massage but would never purchase one for themselves? The holidays are the perfect time to give a massage gift card. A massage relaxes muscles, relieves stress, gets rid of knots, and can help with chronic pain.
Swedish massages utilize broad strokes up and down the body, focusing on specific regions. Hot stone massages help relax tight muscles by placing warm stones on particular points. A deep tissue massage is an intense massage, targeting muscle knots. There’s also Shiatsu, a Japanese technique where the therapist applies pressure to multiple areas, holding each one for several seconds. Reflexology applies pressure to reflex areas of the feet and is especially wonderful for someone who stands for long periods of time.
Body wraps seal in various skin treatments for intense results. With a seaweed wrap, a warm seaweed paste is applied to the entire body. Seaweed is great for skin detox and is rich in vitamins and amino acids. An herbal wrap uses nourishing herbs blended with oils to smooth and soothe. A mud wrap sounds messy, but it’s perfect for drawing impurities from the body as it dries. (And a luxurious post-wrap shower is generally included in the treatment.)
You can’t go wrong with a beauty gift package. If you’re concerned that your recipient won’t have much fun opening an envelope with a gift card, think outside the envelope! You can get creative with gift presentation. Hide the card in a decorated mason jar filled with candy. Embellish a small jewelry box, add a ribbon, and hang it on the tree. Put it in a small cosmetic bag along with some travel-sized beauty products, and you have a great stocking stuffer. For a mani or pedi gift card, place the card in a box, cover it with cotton balls, and place a bottle of nail polish on the top. The more creative your presentation, the more fun your recipient will have opening your gift.
Now that you’ve given others the holiday gift of beauty and stress relief, don’t forget to pamper yourself, too! You’re someone special.
Sources for this article included: sallybeauty.com, pinterest.com, and salonsdirect.com.
By Loretta McCollum
Income Outcome
No-Drama Llama
Choose a Positive Path
“Roller coasters are fun to ride, but you don’t want to live on one.” — Anonymous
Do you remember when we were teenagers and there was drama at every turn? The gossip mill was on overdrive—whispering about who broke up, who had a fight, who was going to be prom king or queen…and who SHOULD be prom king or queen! I get tired just thinking about the drama.
“Some people create their own storms, then get upset when it rains.” — Anonymous
As we mature, most of us begin to veer away from this type of petty crisis. We have enough legitimate challenges in our own lives to deal with…kids, spouses, aging parents, challenging work environments. Piling more drama on top is just too much.
“Just because some people are fueled by drama doesn’t mean you have to attend their performance.” — Anonymous
Unfortunately, not everyone in our lives has made this transition. We all have people in our circle who actually do not feel alive unless there is some sort of conflict going on. They will even be the instigators to see others suffer. Scenario? You haven’t seen them in some time. You ask how they have been. Before you know it, 25 minutes have passed, and you have heard all the negative experiences they felt compelled to share with you. Ouch…drama dump! What do we do now?
“Walk away in silence from anything that doesn’t improve your life. Calm among chaos is a sign of emotional maturity.” — Vex King
In days gone by, I admit, I would find myself leaning into the drama…wanting to get the details. I found myself matching up with their negativity. I dug down to share my own negative stories, looking for someone to commiserate with. I not only wasted way too much time on drama that was none of my business, but I succeeded in draining my own positive energy!
“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.” — Wayne Dyer
Today? No more. There is no longer any upside for me in these types of interactions. I know that I cannot control them, but I can control me. I now can feel it in my gut when we are starting down this negative path. And I nip it in the bud. If I can’t quickly steer the conversation to a positive path, I politely disengage from that person and move on…to my own peace.
“Be a no-drama llama. Don’t create it. Don’t invite it. Don’t associate with it. — Karen Salmansohn
By Janet Van deWalle
Kids Comments
Preparing for the Holidays
Enjoy the Spirit of the Season
This time of year, whenever The Girls get together, our conversation seems to follow the same script: There’s so much to do in so little time…shopping, cooking, baking, entertaining, wrapping gifts, writing and sending cards and thank-you notes, cleaning…the list goes on. We all like the season but are tired of doing things that don’t seem to be appreciated. We started some of these traditions when we were younger and had more energy. Now, they’ve become ingrained in our brains…we have to do it because everyone expects it. Or do they? Most of us admitted that we’ve never asked. How should we handle it all?
We came to a consensus: have the family help! Jana says that after her family switched to artificial trees, they started putting up and decorating several trees. Their main tree was the fanciest and the first to be decorated. “John pours the wine and we spend a relaxed and genial evening decorating,” she confides. “The kids’ tree is in the family room. It’s theirs to decorate as they choose. A third tree on the patio is decorated with animal-friendly decorations the kids pick out. Everybody has a say.”
Cara and Carl put up one tree…a pre-lit beauty covered with nostalgic decorations accumulated over the years. “We keep everything simple by eliminating most of the stuff that takes time,” Cara says. “We’ve decided it isn’t necessary anymore, since the family doesn’t live nearby. Now we have time to enjoy the season. We usually visit the kids after the holidays. Spending time with them is a better gift for all of us…and a lot more fun.”
Sara dreads gift shopping. “The family has grown distant…we don’t get together as often. Shopping isn’t much fun with no one to share it with! After Sam passed, I started giving everyone money gifts. It seems impersonal, but I figure the fit and color are right, there’s no need for returns, and no worries about catering to individual tastes.” Sara was beginning to feel her gifts were unappreciated. Last year, she gave everyone a stationery set: paper, matching envelopes, a pen, postage stamps, and a note from her saying the materials could be used anytime they had news to share with her. “I actually received thank-you notes from the nieces, nephews, and grandkids,” she reports.
We had several other ideas for getting the family involved in the holiday preparations. Adults and kids alike can help make shopping lists, share in planning menus, and get ready for holiday entertaining. Baking is a natural group activity…everyone gets to taste when you’re done. Try getting the family involved in an activity that benefits others.
Helping makes the season enjoyable for everyone. By working together, we’ll all share in the spirit of the season.
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Editor’s Note: Marge has three children, two grandchildren, and numerous nieces and nephews. She holds advanced degrees in education. Her life’s mission is to teach everyone that kids are people, too.
By Marge Shoemaker, BS, MS
Interiors By Design
’Tis the Season
The Magic of Luxury Home Gifts
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It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Spirits are bright, and hearts are filled with joy. It’s also a time for heartfelt gift-giving. Meaningful gifts that continue to bring joy long past the holiday season are the best gifts of all! Giving your family a luxurious home gift—something they would never splurge on for themselves—is a wonderful idea. Why not make this holiday memorable with gifts that stand apart from the crowd and leave an impression that will last a lifetime?
There’s nothing quite like the feeling of receiving a gift that is custom tailored just for you. Imagine the joy that a custom closet, office, or garage would add to your loved one’s life! With this gift, you give time-saving organization, all wrapped up in an aesthetically beautiful space that adds value to the recipient’s home. Perhaps you have a family member setting up their very first home or one who is a budding design enthusiast. Give the gift of style with a complimentary interior designer consultation or a gift card for their favorite custom furniture store.
Bespoke furniture is a timeless gift that carries a very special meaning. A custom dining table makes a beautiful statement and serves as a gathering place for family and friends to celebrate special occasions. Crafted from the finest materials and built to the highest standards, a custom table becomes a family heirloom to be treasured for generations. A bespoke game table makes a great gift idea for a family that enjoys games. Commission a craftsperson to create a one-of-a-kind table or a custom board for your family’s favorite game. Inspired by the family’s individual style, the finished product is an amazing practical conversation piece that makes the ultimate fun and luxurious gift.
Visual art conveys a profound thoughtfulness and has the unique ability to connect with us on a deeply emotional level. While buying art for a loved one may seem like a daunting task, do not shy away from the challenge! With a bit of thought and careful consideration of your recipient’s interests and style, you can select a beautiful and unexpected gift. Choose a work of art that will resonate with a loved one. Have a nature enthusiast or beloved pet in the family? Consider nature inspired artwork or a special pet portrait. A commissioned work of art from a favorite artist is a gift that truly lasts a lifetime. A portrait of the home itself makes a spectacular gift for the people who live there.
From clean-lined abstract pieces to organic and free-flowing works, a sculpture provides visual interest to any space—indoors or out. An interesting sculpture can spark thought-provoking conversation among visitors to a home. Consider engraving a personal message. Be sure to include a note explaining why the particular piece made you think of the recipient and a bit about the background of the piece and the artist.
A custom frame is a thoughtful and beautiful way to show someone you care. Custom framing can elevate a special memory to an art form. Whether it’s a wedding photograph, a diploma, or a child’s special drawing, a well-chosen frame enhances the beauty of its subject matter. Custom frames also protect and preserve the item within, ensuring it can be enjoyed for years to come. A custom frame can be part of a gift that also includes the artwork, or the framing itself can be the gift. As with all art, consider the recipient’s personal style and home décor. The best frame complements both the item being framed and the environment in which it is displayed.
A home theater system totally changes the experience of television viewing. Watching movies in the comfortable and cozy surroundings of home—with snacks and drinks close by—is a dream shared by many families. A home theater system is a gift the entire family can enjoy, and it’s sure to make those classic holiday movies or exciting sporting events a lot more fun for family and friends!
Another practical and convenient gift idea that can improve the everyday quality of life for anyone is the gift of smart devices for the home. Make a loved one’s home a hub of technology, safety, and convenience with smart speakers, smart lights, smart plugs, or even a robot vacuum cleaner.
The best gifts are personal and meaningful, where the value goes beyond a mere material possession. By giving a gift that stands the test of time, you create a memorable holiday experience. The perfect home gift is an enduring gift that will continue to bring joy to your loved ones all year long!
Sources for this article included: hgtv.com, apartmenttherapy.com, and consumerreports.org.
By Robyn V. Powell
Home Works
Fire Safety at Home
Red Flags During the Holiday Season
Fire safety is one of those things you remember hearing a lot about as a kid but may take for granted a bit as an adult. Unfortunately, potential fire danger doesn’t decrease when you’re not thinking about it. The key to fire safety is knowing what to watch out for.
The most common causes of household fires are often overlooked. Smoking or vaping indoors or improperly disposing of ashes can easily start a fire. Leaving stove burners unattended or leaving lighters in reach of children are also big dangers. Things that slip your mind, like checking for recalls on your appliances and electronics or cleaning a dirty range hood regularly, can lead to big trouble. Your trusted lamps can overheat if you’re using the wrong bulbs, and previously well-fitting plugs can loosen over time. Loose sawdust or other DIY projects in the workroom can be fire hazards. And then there’s the obvious—placing furniture or draperies too close to heaters or fireplaces. There are risks all over the house!
The holidays bring additional fire risks because we tend to bring out additional light fixtures. The US Fire Administration recommends keeping candles in a stable holder at least 12 inches away from anything that can burn (or using battery-operated, flameless alternatives). Check holiday lights for frayed or pinched wires, and read the label to see how many strings you can connect together. If you bought a live tree, water it daily and dispose of it when it becomes dry. Keep it at least three feet away from any heat sources or open flames.
Clothes dryers are another big cause of home fires. We all know to regularly empty the lint trap, but the National Fire Protection Association (NFPA) also recommends that you have your dryer installed by a professional who will check for additional lint collected around the drum. Other dryer safety tips include making sure your air exhaust vent is not restricted and that the exterior vent will open when operating. Have gas dryers inspected regularly by professionals, and make sure you are using the right plug and outlet combination. A deep clean of the dryer vent is recommended every 12 months.
A chimney’s singular function is to remove smoke and hot ash from your home, so it had better be in good shape. Sweep out ashes and clean the doors every time you use the fireplace. Arrange an annual inspection and cleaning by a professional chimney sweep certified by the Chimney Safety Institute of America.
Another commonly overlooked fire hazard is overloaded outlets. Danger signs include frequent circuit breaker trips or appliances failing to draw enough power; flickering, dimming, or blinking lights; discolored wall plates or warm-to-the-touch outlets; burning odors; or mild shocks when touching an outlet. To prevent this, avoid plugging too many high-amperage appliances into a single outlet, limit the use of extension cords, hire an electrician to upgrade your electrical system, and know the correct amperage of fuses and circuit breakers in your house.
Having the proper alarm systems in your home is also a fire safety boon. Most single-family homes do not have a full fire alarm system. Fire alarm systems usually appear in multiple-family dwellings and commercial or public buildings and consist of heat detectors, smoke detectors, manually operated switches, and a water flow system (like sprinklers).
Single-family homes usually rely on smoke detectors, which come in four types: ionization, photoelectric sensor, heat detector, and dual ionization and photoelectric sensor. Ionizing smoke alarms are quicker at detecting flaming fires, whereas photoelectric sensors are better at detecting smoldering fires. Naturally, having a dual smoke detector is your safest bet, and all alarms should have their batteries tested monthly and replaced annually.
If you’re not sure whether your home has the right protection or you need help installing smoke or carbon monoxide detectors, call the fire department (at their non-emergency number). They will come to your house to inspect or install your detectors at no charge, including specialized detectors for the deaf or hard of hearing and detailed home walk-throughs with older adults. They would love to come to your home for an appointment instead of during an emergency!
The last item on our fire safety list is an emergency evacuation plan. Everyone in your family should know (and regularly review) this plan. The NFPA recommends walking through your home and marking every possible exit and escape route. Help children practice opening windows and doors and, if necessary, show them how to climb to safety. Fire safety is no laughing matter, and being aware and prepared is the best way to keep you and your family safe.
Sources for this article included: usfa.fema.gov, nfpa.org, and hgtv.com.
By Anne Yankus
To Your Good Health
Stay Merry, Not Weary
Have a Healthy Holiday Season
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The decorating, shopping, and festive gatherings of the holiday season are all part of the fun, but the hectic pace can also bring stress, disrupt routines, and allow unhealthy habits to sneak into our lives. These changes can quietly wear down the immune system. When you feel a little “run down,” pay attention! That’s your immune system giving you a heads-up to hit pause. Staying healthy is the key to having energy for everything from cookie swaps to that midnight toast on New Year’s Eve.
Habits that can weaken your immune system often happen without you noticing. It could be things as simple as relying on fast food for a quick meal while you’re out shopping, staying up late to wrap presents, smoking or drinking a bit too much at parties…and the stress you feel when you realize that the holidays are making you more tired than they used to. As we get older, our immune system naturally slows down, making us more prone to infections and illnesses. When you feel extra tired after a few days of holiday fun that used to be a breeze, your immune system is reminding you to take it easy.
Autoimmune diseases, exposure to pollution, and chronic conditions like diabetes can also weaken your immune system. Don’t underestimate the impact of long-term stress. Increased cortisol levels can make your body more vulnerable to seasonal viruses. When your immune system is compromised, it struggles to fend off bacteria and viruses, increasing the risk of catching colds, the flu, and even more severe infections. Plus, it takes longer to recover.
You can’t control everything, but you can do plenty to boost your immune system and sail through the holidays with the energy of one of Santa’s elves (well, maybe not quite that much energy). To feel your best, incorporate the following healthy choices.
Getting enough sleep is key to keeping your immune system in good shape. When you’re asleep, your body produces cytokines—proteins that support your immune system’s fight against infections. People who don’t get enough sleep are more likely to get sick after being exposed to viruses. Aim for seven to eight hours of solid sleep each night.
Eating a healthy, nutrient-packed diet does wonders for your immune system. Fill your plate with fruits and veggies loaded with antioxidants that protect your cells from damage. Citrus fruits are packed with vitamin C, and zinc-rich foods like nuts and seeds strengthen your immune defenses. You can even sprinkle in some garlic, ginger, and turmeric for their anti-inflammatory and immune-boosting benefits.
If you smoke, it’s time to stop. Smoking weakens your body’s defenses and makes you more likely to catch respiratory infections.
Stress is a sneaky immune system zapper, especially when it sticks around for too long. Chronic stress raises your cortisol levels, which can weaken your immune response over time.
Taking a few minutes every day for stress-busting activities like deep breathing, yoga, or meditation can make a world of difference.
Staying hydrated helps your body circulate immune cells and flush out toxins. If you’re not drinking enough water, your immune system slows down, making you more vulnerable to illness. Health experts recommend aiming for about eight to ten glasses of water daily, though you might need more if you’re exercising, stressed, or in a warm climate.
Regular exercise boosts your immune system by increasing circulation, which helps immune cells move around the body more efficiently. Exercise also reduces inflammation and helps renew immune cells. Every day, aim for at least 30 minutes of activity, like a brisk walk or swim, to help your immune system do its job.
Don’t forget about your gut health! Your digestive system is home to trillions of microbes that play a significant role in your immune defense. Probiotics, found in fermented foods like yogurt, kimchi, and sauerkraut, help maintain the right balance of good bacteria in your gut. Adding these foods to your diet can help keep your digestion on track and strengthen your immune response.
If you’re traveling during the holidays, take precautions so you don’t waste your trip feeling crummy. Keep hand sanitizer and disinfecting wipes in your bag. Don’t forget to wear a mask, if needed—nobody wants to catch your cold, either. Of course, frequent hand washing and staying up to date on your seasonal vaccinations are easy ways to stay protected when traveling. (If you’re traveling internationally, you may need specific vaccinations; ask your doctor.)
Think of your immune system as your bodyguard, working behind the scenes to protect you from illness. Giving it the resources it needs for the fight will help you have a healthy holiday season.
Sources for this article included: health.ucdavis.edu, mayoclinic.org, and health.harvard.edu.
By Leslie Byrne
Focus On Finance
The Oracle 2.0
Do as I Do, Not as I Did
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Every day, I stumble across articles touting Warren Buffett’s latest stock transactions as the key to financial nirvana. Unfortunately, most evaluations of Buffett’s current activity relate to the investment approach he used back when Berkshire was in its infancy. It wouldn’t hurt the financial media to read up on the history of Berkshire before offering advice!
After graduating from UNL with a degree in business administration, Buffett went to New York to study under Benjamin Graham, the father of value investing. In 1952, Buffett returned to Omaha and formed an investment partnership where he put Graham’s methodology into practice.
The initial format of the Buffett partnership was that the partners would deposit cash into the partnership, and Buffett would invest those assets into publicly traded companies. In the fine print, he added that he would not reveal the specifics of the investments until after the fact.
In 1962, the partnership purchased all the outstanding shares of Berkshire Mills, and Buffett went from managing an investment company to managing an operating company. In 1967, Berkshire acquired National Indemnity, a property casualty insurance company. Insurance companies take in their customers’ premiums and then invest them in preparation for the time they will have to pay them out as claims. As CEO of Berkshire, Buffet took over as the manager of National Indemnity’s investment operation…an operation with very different parameters than those of simply investing a partnership’s money.
During this era, stock transactions were completed on the floor of a cavernous exchange by guys in blue coats, barking into landline phones. Stock quotes arrived in a hard copy of the Wall Street Journal delivered to your front porch every morning. When Buffett became a value investing guru, the concept of discovering an undervalued stock was a workable investment guidepost, because financial statements arrived by snail mail, not email.
Today’s instant availability of everything you can know about publicly traded companies has made discovering underpriced stocks a thing of the past. Under these conditions, it would be impossible for investment luminaries such as John Templeton and Peter Lynch to rise above the crowds.
The notion that Berkshire’s meteoritic stock price increase relies solely on Buffett’s stock-picking prowess declined in the mid-1990s. During his remarks at the annual meetings, Buffett proclaimed that Berkshire had grown to a size that precluded stock purchases from moving the needle. Going forward, he opined, Berkshire’s future would rely on the purchase of operating companies.
In order to fully understand Berkshire’s business model, you have to recognize that the investment portfolio referred to by those hoping to ride Buffett’s coattails to fame and fortune represents less than 20 percent of the value of the now trillion-dollar company.
It is also critical to understand the origin and function of that portfolio. In 1997, Berkshire acquired Geico, another property casualty company. In 2002, the percentage of Berkshire’s assets in wholly owned operating companies exploded exponentially with the acquisition of Ge Re, another property casualty company. This dramatically increased the percentage of the Berkshire portfolio that was the float of the insurance companies and not the investable retailed earnings of the other Berkshire operating companies.
As Berkshire moved into the 21st century, the operating companies comprised 80 percent of the company’s assets and the investment portfolio had shrunk to less than 20 percent. At this juncture, Buffett concentrated his efforts on the operating companies and began to back away from managing the portfolio. In 2007, Buffett handed over the day-to-day operation of the Berkshire portfolio to the two Ts—that is, Todd Combs and Ted Weschler. While they make the transactions, rest assured that Buffett is aware of their every move.
My first face-to-face encounter with Buffett occurred on September 12, 1992. How can I be so specific? I took notes, and I still have them. They are a bit faded, but legible. The occasion was a lecture he gave at the Omaha Press Club. During the Q&A session, a lady in the front row asked, “What should I be buying?” Without hesitation, he replied, “An S&P 500 index fund.”
In 2017, Buffett brought Jack Bogle, the founding father of index funds, to the Berkshire meeting. In his introduction of Bogle, he emphatically proclaimed that Jack “has done more to help individual investors than any person on the planet.” (If you dig deep into current Berkshire portfolio, you will find two index fund positions: SPY and VOO.)
If you want to invest based upon Buffett/Berkshire’s current activities, you need to become the CEO of a trillion-dollar conglomerate and then buy a railroad and several enormous insurance companies. If you want to invest based on Buffett’s current advice, buy an S&P 500 index fund.
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Editor’s Note: George Morgan has five decades’ experience in all phases of the investment process. He is currently the Founder and Principal of Morgan Investor Education. His website is morganinvestoreducation.com.
The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. To determine which investments may be appropriate for you, consult your financial advisor prior to investing.
By George Morgan
Seasons of Life
Palliative Care vs. Hospice Care
It’s All About Quality of Life
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The terms palliative care and hospice care are sometimes confused. This confusion is understandable—they both focus on the comfort of a patient with a serious disease and provide symptom relief through coordinated care. Palliative care focuses on the comfort and well-being of a patient while treatments to cure or extend life are pursued. Hospice care is reserved for the final stages of a terminal illness, after curative treatment is discontinued.
Palliative care is beneficial for those with illnesses such as heart disease, cancer, lung disease, kidney failure, or dementia. A palliative care team may include doctors, nurses, social workers, chaplains, or others to add support to and complement ongoing care. This type of care can be extremely helpful to a person who is experiencing a serious medical condition, allowing them to live well despite their illness. One needn’t wait—in fact, shouldn’t wait—until physical or emotional pain is extreme before seeking palliative care.
Hospice care is a form of palliative care for patients who are no longer pursuing a cure. Caregivers provide physical, emotional, and spiritual comfort. A team with specialized training provides care in a variety of settings, including at the patient’s home, in a skilled nursing facility, or in a dedicated hospice facility.
During any serious illness, physical symptoms and emotional stress have a negative impact on one’s quality of life. Pain and discomfort may restrict normal activities. Mobility may be limited and can disrupt social interaction. A personal physician may coordinate treatment, but additional support is crucial. Family members often provide care but may need instruction and emotional support.
Palliative care addresses issues like nausea, pain, anxiety, difficulty breathing, insomnia, and depression. The care team works to ease the burden of a serious and debilitating illness. Care may be provided in hospitals, at home, at outpatient clinics, or in nursing homes.
The disease and its symptoms will likely guide the palliative care plan. With newly diagnosed cancer, for example, patients may choose palliative care to help manage the adverse effects of radiation or chemotherapy or to support recovery following surgery. Patients with cardiovascular issues may benefit from help with decision making and improvement in the ability to care for themselves. With dementia, palliative care might include treatment for the anxiety that often occurs.
Five stages of palliative care are recognized. The first stage is creating a plan that includes current and future treatment, expected progression, medications and symptom relief, and preferred care facilities. The second stage is emotional preparation, which happens with the help of a social worker, counselor, or clergy member. The third stage is early-stage care. Patients may still be at home, with adaptations, or may be in an assisted living facility. The fourth stage is known as late-stage care, which is provided if the disease progresses. The fifth stage of palliative care is support for loved ones at the end of life.
When treatment is no longer effective, palliative care may transition to primarily comfort care and planning emotionally for the end of life. Finally, when the physician determines that death is likely within the next six months, hospice care will be offered. (If it isn’t offered, you can ask for it.) Curative treatment is discontinued. The goal is to live as well as possible for one’s remaining time.
A trained hospice team supplements the care being given at home or in a nursing home. It might involve a nurse’s aide coming in a few times a week for an hour or so, as well as a weekly visit from an RN. If home health equipment is needed, the hospice team will order it. Social workers and clergy provide emotional support.
Depending on patient and caregiver needs, Medicare-certified hospices must offer four levels of care. Routine home care is when the patient is stable and symptoms are controlled. General inpatient care is provided in a hospital or nursing facility when symptoms require additional measures. Continuous home care is crisis-level care for when symptoms are out of control. Respite care is temporary care provided at an inpatient facility to give family caregivers a break.
The care team, along with the patient and family caregivers, will make decisions on the level of care needed. This includes the possibility of going off hospice and returning to treatment if the condition stabilizes. If a hospice facility is needed, you can learn about certified facilities in your area at medicare.gov. You’ll want to know if your insurance is accepted, what services are covered, and the level of staffing.
Palliative and hospice care are all about improving quality of life. Shouldn’t that begin sooner rather than later?
Sources for this article included: elder.org, medicare.gov, and aarp.org.
By Linda Barnes
Peak Performance
Solutions for Depression
A Common Illness
If you’ve experienced periods of sadness that you feel could be something more, you are not alone. Approximately 280 million people have depression, and it is about 50 percent more common among women than among men. Let’s learn to recognize depression so we can better fight it.
Major depressive disorder (MDD) is a mental disorder characterized by at least two weeks of pervasive low mood. Symptoms can include sorrow, irritability, a feeling of emptiness or hopelessness, loss of interest in things you used to enjoy, trouble concentrating, a sudden dip in self-esteem, fatigue, and trouble eating or sleeping.
Depression can look different in men and women. Men are perhaps more likely to present as angry or irritable, rather than sad. And although increased use of alcohol or drugs can be a sign of depression in anyone, men are more likely to use these substances as a coping strategy.
Children experience depression, too. In younger kids, keep an eye out for sadness, clinginess, inexplicable aches and pains, and school refusal. In teens, depression might show up as poor attendance or performance at school. They may feel worthless or misunderstood. Coping mechanisms might include consuming drugs or alcohol, eating or sleeping too much, self-harm, loss of interest in normal activities, and avoidance of social interaction.
There are different types of depression, though they all tend to share the same basic group of symptoms: sadness and fatigue, feelings of low self-worth, and loss of interest in previously enjoyable activities.
A major depressive episode is defined as lasting at least two weeks. Persistent depressive disorder involves less severe symptoms that typically last for at least two years. Perinatal depression appears during or after pregnancy. Prenatal depression occurs during pregnancy, and postpartum depression occurs after childbirth. Seasonal affective disorder typically emerges in late fall and early winter and wanes in the spring. Depression with symptoms of psychosis is a severe form of the condition in which the individual experiences delusions or hallucinations.
The good news is that depression is among the most treatable of mental disorders. According to the Cleveland Clinic, most people (80 to 90 percent) who seek treatment for depression eventually respond well. There is no “one-size-fits-all” treatment for depression. Finding the treatment that works best for you may take some trial and error.
With psychotherapy, individuals meet with a mental health professional to discuss their challenges. This helps patients recognize harmful thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that contribute to depression so they can make positive changes.
Antidepressant medications work by changing how the brain produces or uses chemicals involved in mood or stress. You may need to try several antidepressants before finding the one that improves your symptoms and has manageable side effects. Antidepressants take time—usually four to eight weeks—to work, and problems with sleep, appetite, and concentration often improve before mood lifts. It is important to give a medication a chance to work.
Brain stimulation therapies such as electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) and transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) may be helpful when other therapies are ineffective. ECT passes small electric currents through the brain, resulting in changes to the brain’s chemistry. TMS stimulates the brain with magnetic fields.
Some people find relief with products like vitamin D and the herbal supplement St. John’s wort. Talk to your health provider before adding any supplements to your diet. Daily morning light therapy is common treatment choice for people with seasonal affective disorder.
Complementary therapies such as acupuncture, reflexology, meditation, massage, guided imagery, yoga, deep breathing, and exercise may help individuals with depression. These therapies may provide additional benefits when combined with traditional medical treatments.
People with depression may not know or be willing to admit that they’re depressed. If they’re unaware of the symptoms of depression, they may think their feelings are normal. If they know they’re depressed, they might mistakenly believe they should be able to overcome it with willpower. But depression seldom gets better without treatment and may get worse.
Try talking to the person about why you are worried. Explain that depression is a health condition that improves with treatment. Help them develop a list of questions for their initial appointment with a professional. Let them know that you will help set appointments and go with them if they want support. If you think someone might harm themselves, contact emergency medical services.
If you think you have depression, know that understanding this is the first step on your way to feeling better. Talk to your primary care provider, who can help you figure out the next steps. In the meantime, try to maintain a regular sleep schedule, eat regular meals, and connect with others. There’s no reason to tackle depression alone!
Sources for this article included: mayoclinic.org, nih.gov, and psychologytoday.com.
By Deborah Daley
Auto Wise
Winter Driving
Slow, Steady, Safe
Yep, winter is coming…and with it, all the treacherous and difficult driving conditions that make you want to stay by the fireplace. You can’t always stay home, so you’re bound to encounter winter road conditions sooner or later. Let’s break down some of the significant issues with winter driving.
Snow and ice on roads reduce traction, making it harder to steer, brake, and accelerate…all of which increases the chance that you’ll lose control of your vehicle. An added complication to winter driving is reduced visibility from snowfall, not to mention the ever-present but invisible danger of black ice. And have you ever noticed how everyone forgets how to drive after the first snowfall of the season? Hard truth: You do, too. It takes a minute to reacclimate ourselves to slippery conditions, and everyone else on the road is doing the very same thing. Let’s give each other some space!
There are a few items to check on your vehicle before you hit the road. For traction, check that your tire tread is sufficient. For visibility, check that your windshield wipers are in good condition and that your washer fluid is the kind that won’t freeze. You should also check your battery. It takes a lot of energy to start a car in the bitter cold, and you don’t want to get stuck! If you need help with any of these safety checks, ask your mechanic for guidance.
There are some adjustments to make to your driving when road conditions are slippery. Increase your following distance so that you have plenty of time to stop for vehicles ahead of you—don’t put yourself in a position where you’d have to slam on your brakes. Make speed and directional changes gradually and avoid sudden, jerky movements.
Look for trouble spots ahead as you are driving. If your car does begin to skid on ice, turn the steering wheel in the direction of the skid. This should help to steer your car back on the right track. Use extra caution on bridges and overpasses that might be icy and drive with your low beam headlights on, even in the daytime.
I highly recommend membership in an auto club. Personally, I am a member of AAA, and they have come to my rescue on several occasions. They will fix a flat, jump start your vehicle, tow your car, and drive you to a repair shop. They provide just about any kind of roadside assistance you may need.
Looking for a new vehicle? Let’s consider some vehicles that perform particularly well on snow and ice.
The Subaru Outback gets high marks because of its maneuverability. This crossover wagon/SUV comes with symmetrical AWD and has an impressive ground clearance of 8.7 to 9.5 inches. The Outback includes safety features like blind-spot monitoring, emergency steering assistance, rear cross-traffic alert, and reverse automatic braking. Older models (2008 and earlier) may have fewer automated features, but they still handle well in the snow and remain a good choice for winter reliability and safety.
The Mazda3 AWD Sedan or Hatchback (2018 and later) has a good balance of price and features. AWD comes standard on all Mazda3 Turbo models, or you can upgrade to AWD from the FWD that comes standard on most other Mazda3 sedans and hatchbacks.
The Chevrolet Tahoe 4WD (2015 and later) is large but agile. You can toggle between FWD and 4WD to suit the road conditions. Its sheer size and weight give it an advantage over most mid-size SUVs and crossovers when it comes to traction. Its 7.9 inches of ground clearance will bust through the snow drifts and icy ridges that snowplows leave behind.
The Toyota RAV4 (2018 and later) is a great winter vehicle when you buy one that includes the optional AWD. Different modes for the two AWD systems available allow you to tweak the powertrain to suit conditions.
The BMW 3 Series xDrive (2011 and later) delivers full-time AWD in a mid-size car package. Its German engineering maintains agility in a wide range of conditions, and it electronically monitors and varies the front/rear torque split as needed. The 6.5-inch ground clearance will keep you moving even in fairly deep snow.
Are electric cars good for winter driving? If it has AWD, good ground clearance, and an even weight distribution, it should serve you well during the snowy season. EVs offer some additional advantages because their heavy batteries create a low center of gravity. Do keep in mind that driving range is reduced in colder temperatures.
Need more information on the safest vehicles for winter driving? Check out Consumer Reports and U.S. News & World Report for unbiased advice.
Sources for this article included: kbb.com, cargurus.com, and the zebra.com.
By Linda Sutherland
The Good Life
Embrace the Season
Creating Joy-Filled Holidays
It’s the holiday season! Although this is a joyous time of year, it can also be overwhelming. Planning, prioritizing, and slowing down will leave you with more time to embrace and enjoy the holiday season. Traditions play an important role this time of year. Holiday traditions nurture bonds and create memories. If you and your loved ones are looking to start a new holiday tradition this year, read on!
Kick off the holiday season by visiting a tree farm to select your own Christmas tree. After you get the tree home, decorate it together. Make or embellish tree ornaments that may also be given as gifts. Decorating cookies is both fun and tasty. A cookie exchange brings everyone in on the fun.
What better way to get into the holiday spirit than to pile into the car and view holiday lights? Volunteering at a soup kitchen or local charity is a meaningful activity that gives back to the community. Whatever the activity, spending time with your loved ones will create traditions everyone will remember.
Many people look forward to holiday parties and family gatherings during the holiday season. Some people thrive while planning these events, but others find hosting a stressful experience. Planning a get-together does not have to be overwhelming! Put some thought into how much time and money you want to spend before you choose your menu, and never underestimate the power of a checklist.
Consider what type of party you want to host and set a budget. Do you want a large affair or an intimate gathering? Remember that an extensive guest list means spending less time with each guest. Plan early and send invitations several weeks before the event. It’s a busy time for everyone!
Plan a simple menu. Consider dishes that can be prepped or made ahead of time. Make life even easier by hiring a caterer. Unless you have a bartender, keep the drink menu simple, too: beer and wine and one specialty cocktail that can be made in a pitcher, like sangria or a spiked punch.
Create a checklist to stay on top of what must be done. Do what you can ahead of time, like preparing food, decorating, and setting tables. Planning ahead and staying organized means you will be able to relax and enjoy your party.
Perhaps getting away for the holidays sounds more appealing. Consider a national park, ski resort, or beach if you enjoy spending time outdoors. For families with children, theme parks offer thrills and special holiday events. If you’re going with a large group, careful planning will help create a trip that everyone will enjoy.
How long do you want to be gone? A shorter trip may be appropriate, depending on the group’s size and the number of generations involved. Select a destination that will be fun for everyone. If children are old enough, involve the whole family in deciding where to go. Do you want a destination with snow, or do you need a break from winter? Think about the type of lodging that will work best for your family. Do you need space to relax? Cook? Also, build rest time into the schedule to avoid tired, cranky family members (including you!).
A travel agent can alleviate the stress of organizing a family vacation by handling the details. These professionals offer insight into destinations, access special pricing, arrange travel and lodging reservations, and are a powerful resource if something goes wrong.
Is gift-giving part of your family’s holiday tradition? If so, do you struggle with gift ideas? The best gift is a thoughtful gift, so start your search by focusing on your recipients’ interests. What sort of books do they read? Do they enjoy cooking? Art projects? Board games? Once you know what they’ve already enjoyed, check in with local shopkeepers for recommendations. Employees at bookstores, cooking stores, and craft stores will be happy to help you find something your loved one might enjoy.
Experience gifts are always special. A zoo or museum membership, concert tickets, a spa day, or a voucher for an art or music class is a gift that keeps on giving. High-tech gifts like Bluetooth speakers or wireless headphones are often a hit with tweens and teens. Outdoorsy folks would appreciate an insulated tumbler, travel backpack, or rechargeable hand warmers. Homebodies might prefer cozy slippers or a couch cupholder tray.
Spending time with loved ones during the holidays is a meaningful part of the season, whether you’re celebrating a tradition, going on vacation, or exchanging gifts. These special times together create moments that family members will treasure for years.
Sources for this article included: ideas.hallmark.com, realsimple.com, and washingtonpost.com.
By Angella Arndt
Great Escapes
Italian Holiday?
Head South!
If you’re planning an Italian vacation but aren’t sure where to go, you’re in luck. I have quite a few friends who are from Italy (or have lived there), and I want to share with you their personal recommendations for an Italian holiday. Do you want to spend your trip learning about ancient history? Do you want somewhere to just relax and walk around on your own? Do you seek an outdoor adventure or a luxury getaway? It’s time to choose your dates, find your travel partners, and get ready to pack!
Wouldn’t it be lovely to explore all of Italy on holiday? That sounds amazing, but it would take several months of travel to see the whole country. For shorter trips, it’s best to explore Italy by region. Which region should you choose first? All of my Italian friends tell me the same thing: “Go to the South!”
Let’s start with Naples (Napoli). The name means “new city” because the current city was built over an ancient one. You can still see plenty of evidence of the old city, both aboveground and in the tunnels and catacombs. The environment is unique, and it’s crowded—Italians and international travelers alike love to vacation in Naples.
My friend Martin describes Naples as “old architecture, full of interesting buildings that contain hidden messages. Homes hanging on the hills, antique libraries, shops, restaurants—keeping the look, taste, and feeling of thousands of years ago. Cuisine is still simple, original. It’s like jumping into another world.”
When you visit Naples, Martin advises, take the time to enjoy just walking around. The Street of Shepherds is famous for its handmade art, including exquisite wood carvings of nativity scenes. Visit some of the old churches and see cherished art like the marble sculpture Cristo Velato (Veiled Christ). Walk the straight path of Spaccanapoli, the street designed to go from the king’s residence straight out of the city, now lined with antique shops and monuments.
Taking an organized tour is a great way to see the city, especially on your first trip. You can also buy or download a guidebook and go at your own pace, resting and eating wherever you choose. Of course, make sure you are not on a diet when visiting Italy, where you will be faced with croissants that are “exploding with Nutella.” Christmas is the most popular time to visit Naples, and it’s a more expensive and crowded time to go. Perhaps it’s so popular because of the traditional fried pizza on December 24th?
Naples has a big harbor, which makes it easy to travel to nearby islands by boat. I’m sure you’ve heard of Capri, famous for the Blue Grotto, visitors on yachts, and exclusive hotels and shopping. Walk or take the funicular to the highest peak, Monte Solaro, for gorgeous views of Naples, Vesuvius, and the Amalfi Coast. Another tourist destination is the island of Ischia. Full of coves, beaches, and unspoiled landscapes, Ischia has over 300 spas, thanks to its hot springs. It’s a great spot to unwind.
The southern Italian city of Caserta is worth a visit just to see the Royal Palace. This UNESCO World Heritage Site is a real treasure. You can tour the apartments, the park, and beautiful English gardens.
Let’s talk about the next Italian city I’ll be visiting: Calabria! Located at the toe of the boot, the area combines beautiful Mediterranean seas and mountainous regions. The culture is different here than in other parts of Italy, and Greek influences are easy to see in the ancient ruins.
My friends Aneta and Daniel have a family home here that they rent on Airbnb. “We are in the beautiful mountains,” they say of their cozy villa, “where you can drive 30 minutes down to one beach or 30 minutes down the other side to another beautiful beach.” Aneta has many recommendations for places to see in Calabria. “There are a lot of beautiful places here,” she says. “The most touristic are Tropea, Capo Vaticano, Pizzo Calabro, Reggio Calabria…these are near the beaches. We also have beautiful mountains called Parco Nazionale della Sila, with forests, lakes, and the biggest sequoia in Europe, at Pino Laricio. At this park, you can eat very tasty food, visit different museums, and snowboard or ski in the winter.” Calabria is a gorgeous place where you can swim, dive, or sail in the crystal blue Mediterranean waters. The nearby scenic mountains are ready for you to hike, bike, and walk the nature trails.
There you have it! Head south for a little something different when visiting Italy. Enjoy a vacation where you can relax as much as you want, enjoy nature as much as you want, and have as many cappuccinos, pizzas, and gelatos as you want. Ciao!
Sources for this article included: visitnaples.eu, italia.it/en, and britannica.com.
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Editor’s Note: Jackie has been a freelance writer since 2006. Her work has appeared in publications including Colorado Golf, Desert Golf, and Canadian Architecture & Design. Her blogs can be found at BoardandRide.com and the luxury and adventure travel website, ArtofTripping.com.
By Jackie Williams
The Green Thumb
Dreaming of Summer
Flowers That Love the Sun
Yes, I know it’s December. There are so many things to love about winter, but I can’t help thinking about what I’m going to plant in the spring…and this spring will be a little different in my yard. Until this last storm season, I had a backyard that was mostly shade. But after the destructive storms and the loss of so many of our shade trees, we now are the dubious owners of a very sunny backyard. It occurs to me that we’re probably not the only people in this situation! So, knowing that I need to rethink the whole garden area, I want to take a look at what we and you gentle readers can plant next spring if you have a newly sunny area to fill.
First, let’s define “a sunny area.” When a plant requires full sun, that doesn’t mean it needs to be in the blazing rays from dawn to dusk. For growing purposes, “full sun” means at least six hours of full sun per day. In your sunny space, it’s great to have easy-to-grow, reliable perennials that have a long bloom time.
Bee balm, also known as bergamot, is one of my all-time favorites. The fact that the flowers attract hummingbirds, butterflies, and bees brings them to the top of my sunny perennial list. Bee balm is related to mint and has a delightfully fragrant foliage. The clusters of tubular flowers come in shades of pink, lavender, purple, red, and white. They continually bloom from late spring to early fall.
Another sun-lover that will perform from late spring to late fall is the black-eyed Susan. These gorgeous flowers never seem to stop blooming and do not require much attention at all. They are a source of nectar for bees and butterflies, and their dry seedheads provide food for birds during the fall and winter months. These daisy-like beauties come in gold, red, orange, bronze, and yellow.
If you are looking for a flower that likes to be ignored, look no further than lavender. This lovely flower is native to the Mediterranean region. The aromatic foliage and blooms can be ornamental, medicinal, and edible. Lavender does need to be planted in an area with good drainage, but after that—they don’t need much water and will thrive in hot conditions.
I have raved about coneflowers in past columns, but it bears repeating…these flowers cannot be beat. In the past few years, new breakthroughs in breeding have resulted in some amazing new colors. The sunset hues are my favorite. Of course, coneflowers (also called echinacea) also come in white, yellow, green, red, and pink. The seedheads provide food for songbirds all winter, and they are an important source of nectar for pollinators.
A gorgeous flower often seen in arrangements is liatris, also known as blazing stars. This easy-to-grow North American prairie native has feathery flower plumes that kind of look like bottle brushes (but much prettier). They come in purple or white and bloom throughout the summer. They need good drainage but are fairly drought-tolerant.
Another fairly carefree sun-lover is catmint. It blooms from late spring until early fall and is a consistent nectar source for hummingbirds, bees, and other pollinators. This mint relative has very aromatic foliage and is very hardy. Neighborhood cats will love you for growing this!
Another non-fussy plant that will give you lots of joy is Russian sage. Many gardeners refer to Russian sage as the workhorse of the garden, and with good reason. It is drought-tolerant, disease-resistant, and disliked by deer. It blooms for weeks on end and is wonderfully aromatic. Its gray-green foliage is truly beautiful waving in the wind.
Another exceptionally hardy, low-maintenance perennial is the daylily. These popular beauties come in virtually hundreds of different varieties, colors, and shapes. Some species have repeat blooms, while others bloom only for a single day. They are long-lived and look great in the front of a garden.
There are so many varieties of flowers to choose from for a sunny garden! Many of them need more time and attention from gardeners, but I haven’t listed those here. As the years have gone by and I have experimented with so many different flowers and plants, I have come to realize that I don’t want fusspots in my gardens anymore. It is too much work! A fussy plant is going to give you nothing but heartache, right up until it dies on you. Sadly, much trial and error has brought me to this conclusion. If you have the patience for fusspots, enjoy! Whether I’m planting for sun or shade, I prefer plants that will take little work once they are established.
By Linda Sutherland
Cuddly Critters
Holiday Help for Pet Owners
New Routines Bring Challenges
As the winter holidays approach, our focus changes. Decorating, shopping for gifts, planning special meals, and entertaining friends and family fill our minds and our time. We may feel a little “off” when we’re so far from our everyday routines. We’re not the only ones who feel this way! Our pets can sense that something has changed. The flurry of holiday activity is unsettling to them, but they can’t read the calendar. They don’t know that holidays are big-time human fun. You need to be sure your plans include attention for your pet.
The holidays present stressful challenges to your pet each year in the form of routine disruption, increased visitors (or increased time when you’re away from home), and the presence of holiday decorations in their space. Dogs (and humans) sometimes forget important lessons when faced with challenges that put stress on relationships.
From day one, you trained your pet with positive reinforcement. It’s time to review that training to renew mutual trust and understanding and to maintain the strong bond you’ve built with your pet. This bond is important for every facet of your lives together.
Take note of your pet’s behavior as the holidays start to impact your schedule. This way, you can identify areas of retraining that are needed. Even just a bit of retraining can eliminate bad habits like jumping on people or forgetting potty training.
During the bustle of the holidays, finding time for retraining seems impossible, but a professional trainer can speed the process along. A dog trainer can help you work through whatever retraining is needed. The trainer can even come to you and show you and your dog what to do so you and your pet can enjoy the holidays.
When choosing holiday decorations, keep your pet’s best interest at heart. Some holiday décor is dangerous for pets. Let’s start with the tree. Anchor it securely to avoid tip-overs. Dogs are curious, and cats climb. Either can bring down all kinds of décor, making a mess of your holiday efforts. Use unbreakable decorations, and skip the tinsel.
Beware of seasonal house plants. Many plants can make an animal sick or worse. Some holiday favorites like holly and poinsettias are toxic if ingested. For a full list of potentially toxic plants, check out aspca.org or americanhumane.org. Further warning for pets on the prowl: The water for your tree’s trunk becomes pet-toxic in a few days.
A major activity during holiday festivities is eating. When our pets see us eating, they want to partake! Holiday foods are too rich and not healthy at all for your animals. Remind your guests not to share with your pets.
Holiday beverages, especially alcoholic ones, may be deadly for pets. No one’s likely to offer your pet a sip of their cocktail, but a guest could easily set a glass down on a low table and walk away. Your pet may seize the opportunity.
Pet owners who entertain friends and family at home use different strategies to keep their pets safe and happy during the party. Cats are likely to handle this on their own—if they don’t want to join the party, you probably won’t even see them.
For dogs, consider taking a long walk before guests arrive. Back at home, put your dog in a room that will be away from the commotion. Stock the room with your dog’s bed or kennel, a favorite toy, and a little treat. Play soft music to keep the noise down. When you have to sequester your dog for several hours, potty pads allow relief for your dog and quick cleanup for you. If your climate allows and your yard is fenced, set your dog’s comfort zone in the yard.
For pets who simply cannot handle the thrill of a full house, consider arranging a mini-vacation for your pet. A brief visit to a favorite friend or relative while you host your holiday open house might be just what your pet needs.
Don’t forget that what your pet wants most is just your attention. While you are busy hanging mistletoe, making eggnog, or visiting friends, your pet may get lonely or bored. Add in a dash of holiday décor, and that’s a recipe for disaster! Remember to allow time for things that make your pet happy: cuddle time, a game of fetch, gentle brushing.
One last note about pets and holidays: Never give a living creature as a surprise gift. You should only consider a pet as a gift if you have discussed it with your recipient ahead of time (and with their parents, if that’s relevant). A pet becomes a member of the family!
Sources for this article included: ASPCA.com, nytimes.com, and humanesociety.org.
By Jackie Byers
Positive Perspective
Falling Down a Rabbit Hole?
Look Up!
“The blurred image around your phone is called your life.” — Shermaine Y. Sanders, PhD
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This past week, my husband Manny and I agreed to put our cell phones away when we are having a conversation…ANY conversation. Like many people, we had fallen into the habit of communicating with one another while simultaneously checking emails, texts, and messages, searching Google, and so on. We realized this is not good!
“Putting your phone away and paying attention to those talking to you? There’s an app for that…it’s called respect.” — Anonymous
I am the first to admit that cell phones are wonderful tools to bring more productivity into our lives. I got my first cell phone clear back in the early ’90s. Problem is, as time went by, our cell phones did so many other things. Camera, clock, watch, emails…and let’s not forget all those apps! It is so easy to get sucked right down that rabbit hole…and before we know it, we are anything but present or in the moment with the person who is sitting right in front of us!
“If your phone is more interesting than the one you’re with, you need to go back to the drawing board because something is out of order. Don’t put FB and IG before your partner.” — Tony Gaskinds
Has it been a challenge? Absolutely. I really had no idea how intrusive this technology had become in our lives. There have been a few stumbles, but we are hanging in there. We are looking one another in the eye when we talk. When we have our morning coffee together, the phones are in the bedroom or out of reach. (That was Manny’s idea!)
“If your smart phone receives more daily charging than your spouse, then it is time to plug into your marriage.” — Anonymous
Not so long ago, I had a dear friend tell me that she called her husband’s phone his “other wife.” Wow. That really hit me like a ton of bricks. No marriage can stay healthy, much less grow to be better, when we allow ourselves to be swept into that rabbit hole! What is the message we send to our spouse when we do this?
“Do you mind if I strap your phone to my forehead so I can pretend you’re looking at me when I talk?” — Anonymous
No more! Give it a try. Break the cycle. Be in the present. Make your marriage the priority, instead of all that other stuff out there. Bottom line? It’s just stuff. And the person sitting right in front of you is a whole lot more important.
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By Janet Van deWalle
